I'm really sad for some reason...Don't you hate that? When you're sad, but you don't really know why...I guess there is some kind of logical reason somewhere...
I thought I was keeping myself from the bad thoughts, but keeping myself busy. It didn't really work much.
I miss him so much... was just putting away clothes..and had my itunes blasting. It was wonderful. No sad songs or anything. Happy, upbeat songs. But as I was placing shirts on hangers and hangers on racks, a frown appeared on my face. I wish I could do that for him...I wish I could take care of him, and do his laundry, and put his clothes away, and he could be sitting on the bed, doing homework or whatever, and smile at me, give me the occasional kiss as I walked to and from the bed where the pile of clothed lay and the closet. I wish he were there to make cute compliments about my singing voice that I really don't think is that great. I wish we could just sit there together and fold clothes, and maybe cuddle afterwards, messing up all our work and then laughing about it. I just wish...
I want to spend the rest of my life with him...Doing silly little things like this. I want it so badly. But just like with all great things, it takes time. Time that eats at you slowly.
I'm sorry my blogs so far are sad...One of these days i'll have something happy to write about.
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